Re: Sunday Ride 5th Februry

[Sweaty Eds]

Well, I’ve got to say, from a Flat Earthers perspective the ride was a roaring success.

For the last couple of weeks I’ve been busy in my shed designing a device to warn of approaching hills, the Dynamo Altometer Vertical Elevation Escaper or DAVE E for short. I had linked it to a GPS and an old air raid siren that sounded whenever the rider approached a gradient steeper than 1 in 10. I had tried it on the turbo trainer a couple of times and it seemed to work, but I needed a volunteer to trial the prototype on a typical club run, Kim agreed to be the test pilot.

The run through Princes Gate was uneventful, with the DAVE E remaining quiet and calm, but the ride from Ludchurch towards Colby and Amroth and the subsequent threat of out of the saddle climbing kicked the Dynamo Altometer Vertical Elevation Escaper into life. It started as a barely audible whine but increased in volume and pitch in line with the closing proximity of the hills. By the time the siren tester and I were forced to stop, my ears were ringing. It must’ve temporarily deafened the riders in the lead group as well because none of them heard our shouts to wait. An unexpected side effect was the immobilising of Kim’s front wheel. Luckily this proved to be only temporary and soon rectified itself when we were safely headed in the opposite direction towards the billiard table flat haven of the Cold Blow levels.

This was my second prototype. The first, the Magnetic Altitude Transmitting Gyrospectrometer seemed to do the opposite of my intentions and actually seek the hills out…..